She came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love
to a very attractive young woman. The wife was VERY upset!
"You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me
- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I
want a divorce straight away!"
And he replied: "Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I can tell
you what happened"
"Fine, go ahead", she sobbed, " but they'll be the last words you'll
say to me!"
And he began: "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and
this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out
and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I
noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She
told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion,
I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last
night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on
weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments. Since she needed a
good clean-up I suggested a shower and while she was doing that I
noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them
away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that
you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are
too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary
present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste. I
found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't
wear just to annoy her and I also donated those boots you bought at
the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a
pair like them.."
He took a quick breath and continued: "She was so grateful for my
understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned
to me with tears in her eyes and said 'Please... do you have anything
else that your wife doesn't use?'"