I once received a fax with a note on the bottom to fax the document
back to the sender when I was finished with it, because he needed to
Tech Support: "All right...now double-click on the File Manager icon."
Customer: "That's why I hate this Windows - because of the icons I'm
a Protestant, and I don't believe in icons."
Tech Support: "Well, that's just an industry term sir. I don't
Believe it was meant to-"
Customer: "I don't care about any 'Industry Terms'. I don't believe
Tech Support: "Well...why don't you click on the 'little
picture' of a filing cabinet...is 'little picture' OK?"
Customer: "My computer crashed!"
Tech Support: "It crashed?"
Customer: "Yeah, it won't let me play my game."
Tech Support: "All right, hit Control-Alt-Delete to reboot."
Customer: "No, it didn't crash-it crashed."
Tech Support: "Huh?"
Customer: "I crashed my game. That's what I said before. I crashed my
Spaceship and now it doesn't work."
Tech Support: "Click on 'File,' then 'New Game.'"
Customer: [pause] "Wow! How'd you learn how to do that?"
I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division
for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I
just couldn't solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors
would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors
are cyan, magenta, and yellow. For instance, green is a combination
of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. Every color of the rainbow
printed fine except for yellow. I had the customer change ink
cartridges. I had the customer delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing
worked. I asked my coworkers for help; they offered no new ideas. After
over two hours of troubleshooting,I was about to tell the customer to send
the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I try
printing on a piece of white paper instead of this yellow paper?"