The husband didn't want to play in the "Couples Alternate Shot
Tournament" at the club, but he reluctantly agreed just for the
sake of martial harmony.
He got the first shot. He teed off, a par four, and fired a drive
300 yard down the middle of the fairway.
When they reached the ball, he said to his wife (a novice golfer),
"Just hit it towards the green, hon, anywhere around there will
She proceeded to knock the ball deep into the woods.
Undaunted, he said, "That's ok, dear, we'll play it." He spent
five full minutes looking for the ball. He played it for the shot
of his life and actually put the ball just two feet from the hole
on the green.
Arriving on the green he said, "Now, dear, all you have to do is
knock it gently into the hole." She whacked it a good one, right
off the green and into a sand trap.
The husband, still retaining his composure, marched into the
sand trap, summoned all of his skill, and amazingly holed the
shot from there.
Retrieving the ball from the hole he put his arm around his wife
and calmly said, "Honey, that was a bogey -- one over par --
but that's ok. I think we can do better on the next hole."
She snapped back at him, "Don't bitch at ME. Only *2* of those
*5* shots were mine!"