This guy sees a sign in front of a house "Talking Dog for Sale." He
rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back yard.
The guy goes into the back yard and sees a mutt sitting there.
"You talk?" he asks.
Yep," the mutt replies.
"So, what's your story?"
The mutt looks up and says "Well, I discovered this gift pretty young
and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift,
and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in
rooms with spies and world leaders, cause no one figured a dog would
I was one of their most valuable spies eight years running. The
jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any
younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a job at the
airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near
suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible
dealings there and was awarded a batch of medals.
Had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants
for the dog.
The owner says "Ten dollars."
The guy says he'll buy him but asks the owner, "This dog is amazing.
Why on earth are you selling him?"
The owner replies, "He's a f*cking liar!