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Newspaper Headlines Date of Joke: Monday, 25th May, 2009
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1. Autos Killing 110 a Day, Let's Resolve to do Better
2. Grandmother of Eight Makes Hole in One
3. Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped
4. Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood
5. Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees
6. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
7. New Vaccine May Contain Rabies
8. Deaf Mute Gets New Hearing in Killing
9. Air Head Fired
10. Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni
11. Man Steals Clock, Faces Time
12. Never Withhold Herpes from Loved One
13. Smokers Are Productive, But Death Cuts Efficiency
14. Two Convicts Evade Noose, Jury Hung
15. Child's Stool Great for Use in Garden
16. Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe Out Literacy
17. Man is Fatally Slain
18. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
19. Is There a Ring of Debris Around Uranus?
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