The chief of staff of the US Army decided that he would
personally intervene in the recruiting crisis affecting all of
our armed services. He directed a nearby Air Force base
that would be opened and that all eligible young men and
women be invited.
As he and his staff were standing near a brand new M-1
Battle Tank, a pair of twin well built, neatly kept brothers
who looked like they had just stepped off an Army Corps
recruiting poster walked up to them. The chief of staff
walked up to them, stuck out his hand and introduced
himself. He looked at the first young man and asked, "Son, what
skills can you bring to the best Army in the world?"
The young man looks at him and says, "I'm a pilot!"
The general gets all excited, turns to his aide and says,
"Get him in today, all the paper work done, everything,
The aide hustles the young man off. The general looks
at the second young man and asked, "What skills can you
bring to this man's Army?"
The young man says, "I chop wood!"
"Son," the general replies, "we don't need wood choppers
in the Army, what else do you know how to do?"
"I chop wood!"
"Young man," huffs the general, "you are not listening to me,
we don't need wood choppers, this is the 20th century and
our battles are fought with our minds as much as with our
"Well," the young man says, "you hired my brother!"
"Of course we did," says the general, "he's a pilot!"
The young man rolls his eyes and says, "Duh! I have to
friggin' *chop* it before he can pile it!"